If you come for the GAA, you better not miss because Julius Augustus Burns will feed you to the lions.
In the long and glorious history of the Roman Empire, there were no more than half a dozen truly great emperors.
The success rate for Great GAA Presidents is something similar.
In the last 30 years, 12 men have been crowned An Uachtarán.
Only one man out of those dozen could be classified as a Great GAA President.
That man was Peter Quinn.
Peter Quinn was a Great GAA President because he got something done. He had the vision, business acumen and political clout to get Croke Park redeveloped.
“Tom Ryan is an accountant. Not surprisingly Tom prefers to sit in his office crunching numbers. That might have been grand if Larry McCarthy had been a go-getter President. But Larry was content to hand out medals.”
At the time we quibbled and griped about the unearthly debt the Fermanagh man was going to foist on the Association. It cost about £100m. A good set of public toilets would cost about the same these days!
As a rule, GAA Presidents fall into two categories:
those who want to do things,
those who don’t.
The Ceremonial Presidents are happy to go around the country, opening pitches, shaking hands and presenting medals.
When the role of director-general was expanded into a more executive position, it was widely believed that all future presidents would retreat into the role of pitch-openers.
Páraic Duffy fulfilled the role of a hands-on director-general. Leading from the front, taking the questions and outlining the GAA’s position on the issues of the day, he laid down an excellent example of how the job should be done.
But the current director-general, Tom Ryan has shown no appetite to follow in the footsteps of Páraic Duffy.
Tom Ryan is an accountant. Not surprisingly Tom prefers to sit in his office crunching numbers. That might have been grand if Larry McCarthy had been a go-getter President. But Larry was content to hand out medals.
So for the last three years we’ve had a director-general bunkered in his office and a GAA President who was nowhere to be seen.
To those of us on the outside looking in, it appeared that the GAA was being run by an emperor we never saw, and by a senate that was totally invisible.
Enter Julius Augustus Burns from Silverbridge in County Armagh.
In the few months since he has taken office, Emperor Burns has been a revitalising and energising force.
Even his presentation speeches at the National League finals were a joy to behold.
With his passion and oratory skills, Jarlath turned a ceremony that we associate with boredom and cliche into an occasion to remember.
One of the most obvious things about Jarlath Burns is that he is a man with a tremendous capacity for love - and what Jarlath loves - he loves deeply.
His family, his place, his club, his county, his native language, the GAA - all these things mean everything to Jarlath.
And what Jarlath loves, he defends to the hilt.
It is this feature of his personality which has already set the new President apart from his most recent predecessors.
For many years the GAA has been an easy target. If you wanted to get an easy political headline, or play to the public gallery with a rabble-rousing soundbite, the GAA was low-hanging fruit.
The best bit for anyone taking these cheap shots was that there was never any fear of a reprisal from Croke Park. With such a reticent leadership, the GAA just became a great big punch bag.
Under Emperor Burns, things have changed.
If you are reading this column, I’m going to presume that you already know how Burns totally eviscerated the Taoiseach Simon Harris and Sean Cavanagh.
In an interview on the Clare Byrne Show, Burns didn’t just dismantle their remarks, he utterly demolished them.
It was a victory in straight sets. Game, set and match. Fast, brutal and emphatic.
For purely vicarious pleasure, it was entertaining to see a GAA President adopt such a robust and aggressive position.
On the playing field, Jarlath Burns was a beast of man. But like most good, big men, he truly understood his power and didn’t abuse it. If he did, he would have left a trail of opponents seriously wounded and maimed.
But in his role as the defender of the GAA, Burns is showing no such clemency.
Nowadays, if you come for the GAA, you better not miss, because if you do, Julius Augustus Burns will feed you to the lions.
On the whole, this is a positive development for the GAA.
As the most important organisation in the country, it is good that the Association has a visible and vocal leader.
That said, it’s important that Jarlath Burns doesn’t confuse defending the GAA’s position with what his job can really be.
Talk is cheap, but it takes a Great GAA President to get things done.
Burns has already stated that he has no intention of tampering with the chronically out-dated provincial Championship. That’s a pity, a mistake, and a debate for another day.
But there is so much more to be done.
Casement Park is a starter.
It will be a long time before we know if Jarlath Burns will take his place among the Great GAA Presidents.
But as he embarks on his new reign, the Armagh man needs to understand that his three years will go past in the blink of an eye.
Even a month from now, few will remember what he said on some radio programme.
All that stuff is mostly piffle.
If Jarlath responds to every clown with an opinion, he is going to waste a lot of his precious time.
Peter Quinn didn’t give many interviews.
Caesar Quinn knew the score.
GAA Presidents are not remembered for what they said.
They are remembered for what they got done.
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